Retail Therapy? More like retail torture

Oh sweet baby Jesus.

I am exhausted. I have power-shopped the last two days away, and I am still not finished.

My calf muscles are throbbing, what with months and months of general unuse, and though I shopped in sneakers, seem to be screaming at me that it is unfair to sideline them all year and then demand they work overtime around the holidays. My feet ache in agreement.

I'll be honest -- there are one and a half shopping days to go and I am not quite sure I am going to be able to finish without beating my head against Wal-Mart shevles or just plopping right down in the middle of Barnes and Noble and sobbing.

Um, I'm yet to buy one single gift for my husband, and also have not completed one iota of bagging thoughful gift wrapping.

You might ask why I am sitting here staring at my monitor, pounding out a blog entry. How can I sleep at night? With all there is to do, where do I get off taking leisure time this evening?

To you I respond with this: suck my balls. I'm exhausted, my back hurts, and I still need to buy the gift wrapping essentials, so there isn't much else I can do tonight. I'm not going back out there until I've had at least eight hours of sleep, a large coffee, and perhaps a foot massage.

And maybe a valium or something, too.

Comments

lol, hang in there Amber! You'll get it done! :)
Travener said…
Well, kiddo, all I can say is that I finished days and days ago, including the wrapping, so nyah, nyah, nyah.

Of course you know I don't mean it.

For hubby: you can never go wrong with booze. Hang in there, Amber. Your legions of fans will be checking in tomorrow to see how much progress you've made, so no matter how tired you are, you have to post!
Tina Lynn said…
Ah, you're a man. That totally explains my inappropriate attraction to you:)
lol, I'm sorry. I know how you feel. I seriously got everyone Amazon gift certificates (which you can print out from your computer) and magazine subscriptions. I don't care if that's lame. The stores were scary.

And as for hubby, we decided early in our marriage not to exchange gifts for holidays, we just do cards. If we want to get something for each other at some random time, then we do that. It takes the pressure off.
carissajaded said…
Ah girl I'm sorry your having a tough day! It will all get done... And sometimes you have to stop and vent for a few. Good luck!
Good luck. Hopefully the USPS delivers the last present for my wife before Thursday, especially since they promised I'd have it Tuesday.

Assholes.
Carol said…
My shithead husband went and bought presents for me on Sunday after we agreed that we were not exchanging gifts (rather have a trip to Mexico!). He is a total pain in the ass to shop for too! I have to Ebay for the strange & unusual gift at least a month in advance to get him something that he will really like. He can just suck it if he doesn't like the t-shirt and socks he is getting!
Jm Diaz said…
Ahh, how I missed the inappropriately placed exclamation that makes my laugh louder than I should here at the office.

I know what you mean.. I haven't shopped for the wife either. Damn...

Best of luck to you kiddo!
Anonymous said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

Popular Posts