TMI Thursday: in which someone didn't plan ahead

Ahh... the bliss of having TMI to tell. Especially when the overshare relates to someone other than me.

See, Sunday afternoon hubs and I went traveled to Lexington for my niece's birthday party. (Happy 5th!) After, we joined the immediate family for dinner at TGI Fridays (where I went a bit preggers-hormonal on the waiter, who really did suck at his job. But that's neither here nor there.)

After a round of good-byes, hubs and I got settled into the car, happy to head back to Louisville -- we're always ready to get away from those Kentucky-Wildcat-loving Lexingtinians. Plus, hubs is a niners fan, so he was excited to get home and watch a bit of the Favre- vs.-49'ers preseason game.

Anywhoddle, hubs was in the drivers seat and Lexington was hardly in his rearview when he said the unthinkable...

"Um, I'm going to have to pull over. I think I pooped my pants a little."

I wanted to burst into immediate hysterical laughter, but then I realized we were in my car so it wasn't quite so funny.

Hubs pulled into Speedway and I asked him to get me a cold beverage after he took care of business. When hubs got out of the car, I was unable to do anything about the little brown trail on the back of his kakhi's. I hoped no one waited in line behind him while he bought my caffeine free drink.

I laughed and shook my head. My eyes landed on the empty driver's seat and the little greasy line that hubs acciddentally left there. Ew.

When hubs opened the car door, I leaned over a bit and said, "Dude, you did poop your pants. It's on the seat!!"

Apparently, some lady walking in the gas station turned and stared and hubs was humiliated. But not as humiliated as me: my 32 year-old husband just pooped himself for no reason. I married that.

I recalled a guy from high school: kind of a sweet-douche-bag... his most redeeming quality is that he made out with me after Junior prom even though he was not my date. Ahh, memories.

Rumor has it, this guy accidentally shits himself on the regular. I've been known to really laugh about that with some girlfriends on multiple occasions.

Man, karma really is a bitch! She made hubs poop his pants to punish me.

Comments

Jen said…
LOLOL... seriously this was hilarious!!! I would be humiliated to have been around that, but laughing after we had left the gas station (one we'd never return to)!

Glad your back Amber... this is one of my favorite posts of the week... not the pooping, just the TMI, LOLOL.
MJenks said…
You're implying that waiters at TGI Fridays are ever good at their job.

As a man missing a gall bladder, I can appreciate this story. Fortunately, I've stopped at Swampass, and not crossed the line into pants defecation.
~*~Lilly~*~ said…
lmao....lmao...lmao.

Wow! See and i thought my husband was the only one who shit himself & i just blamed it on the fact he only left diapers a few years ago. lol

Oh man - your poor car. I think you should make him clean it. ;)
pinkflipflops said…
hahaha.. i am so sure he would love that you told all of us.
Sierra Godfrey said…
LOL!!!! I am totally laughing out loud right now. Oh, God, thank you. That was great. Especially when I finished reading and then glanced back up to the title of the post and it allll made sense.
ND said…
omg, you just made my Thursday. Please tell me that Hubs cleaned your seat!
Vicki Rocho said…
Poor hubs. Does he know you just told the world of his humiliation?

When mine has to go, he has to go NOW. We've had some very interesting emergency pit stops, lemme tell ya. I tell him all the time that growing old with him is going to be quite the trip.
Jm Diaz said…
The ubiquitous shart!! Holly shit (no pun intended) (okay, maybe just a little intended) that’s was funny!
Ashley Stone said…
gross!!! I hope your hubby never finds your blog! haha
Lola Sharp said…
YOU JUST KILLED ME!!! I just died of laughter.

Coffee came out my nose.

"Dude, you did poop your pants. It's on the seat!"

'I married that.'

Ahhhh...good times.

Srsly. You slay me. *wipes tears from eyes*

Love,
Lola
saucyminx410 said…
OMG TERRIBLE!!!LOL! My husband has enver actually pooped his pants but came awfully close one time when we were between bathrooms on a trip. Yikes!

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