Thursday, September 30, 2010

TMI Thursday: show me your milk jugs

So, the first part of this TMI will be scary/sad. Don't get weepy. It turns out okay.

As you know, I love and adore my almost-86-year-old Grandma, who lives about two hours away from me. She had hip replacement surgery a few weeks ago and was moved to the hospital's rehab unit a few days later.

All was going well, until amost two weeks ago on a Sunday night, when my mom got the call that she had been completely unresponsive for over 45 minutes. (All her vitals were okay, but she wouldn't respond to painful stimuli -- like a sterum rub, which supposedly hurts like hell.)

(EKG, EEG, all that were normal. A stroke was ruled out. But still.)

My whole family RUSHED to Bloomington to be with her that night, fearing the worst. Our fears were 100% justified because she claimed that while she was "out" that she saw the pearly gates! She's all, "Let me tell you how you go; I'm at peace about it; line the box with pink and put me in my pink robe; I'm proud of my family, blah, sad, etc..."

Here's where it turns out okay: she's still with us.

And here's when it gets funny: my mom and I went to visit her again this past weekend.

So, my mom had previously seen me getting into the shower, huge preggers boobs and all... you know, with the darkened nips to boot! (If you didn't know, now you do... that happens.)

Anyway, my mother decides to pull the curtain around my grandma's bed. "Show Mammaw your boobs!" she said.

So, I flashed my bedridden Mammaw, who took one look and decided, "You'll scare the baby!"

Meanwhile, my grandma's roommate seems to be wondering what we're up to. My mom explains about the peep show I've given.

THEN, my grandma says, "Show her!"

I'm all, "Mammaw, no, I'm not showing your rehab roommate my boobs. No way."

Awhile later, my Mammaw (whose short term memory isn't what it used to be by a long shot) asks, "Will you show 'em to me again?"

I oblige, but tell her with my shirt still lifted up that I can NOT believe she wanted me to flash her roommate.

My Mammaw has disapproval all over her face and shakes her head as I put my shirt back down.

"You should have showed her, Amber. She would have enjoyed it! She has all sons."

In closing, I would like to take this moment to say that I am not sure how much longer I've got left with my Mammaw... yet I'm so thankful to still be able to make those memories.

*pre-preggers size.* they are now quite unsightly. just ask my grandma.
Thank you.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Photo Growth Chart, or, the Vlog that will never see the light of day

I'll just dive right in without any excuses for my three-week disappearance from blogging.

First and foremost, how bout some Stamos on Glee last night?! (Okay... this is kind of funny. When I started this blog, I almost didn't use it. A year-ish amount of time passed, and when I decided to blog regularly, the way I broke the ice involved John Stamos. That was in September of '09. Take a gander.)

And, for more on my love affair with Uncle Jesse, click here. (That post totes rocked. I'm probably going to have to re-post it at some point. It's top ten, fo sho'.)

Anyway: confession. I secretly just made a little vlog to show you peeps my baby bump, but it was so white tra-shay that I am not able to post it. I was holding the camera up to the mirror in my bedroom whilst I recorded, and it's soooo dark and blurry (not to mention the unmade bed behind me...) that I just have no choice but to feed it to the bowels of the internets.

A picture will have to suffice.

(Yes, that rhymed.)

As a reminder, here's my frontal view at almost 14 weeks:

muffintop in the oven
And here's the latest -- I'm now a whopping 29 weeks preggers -- be warned --  you might want to avert your eyes.

leggo my eggo, cause i'm preggo.
and p.s. that is NOT the same white shirt that i wore in the other picture. It's a bigger one. Obvi.

Weighing in, there are 35 more pounds of amber murphy than there were before-bumpage.
Don't I sound proud of myself?

Yeah, not so much. However, I've been burning calories these days by power walking shopping for the baby!

*Pictures to come.* Stay tuned! I promise to blog more often in the weeks to come. I even have a fun TMI for tomorrow, so get ready.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

top ten things I've done lately

Friends, if you miss me half as much as I've missed you then we're in business... let me just get the "I suck at blogging and life" pity-party out of the way.

Okay. Donewiththat.

Here's what I've been up to since we last spoke.

1.) Convinced hubs to let me paint over the creepy M & M people in our nursery-to-be. (As you may recall, this wall art is leftover from the previous home owners.)

2.) Driven to Goodwill 6523 times and donated about 531213 pounds of clothes and other trivial junk lovely home decor.

3.) Cleaned out EVERYTHING from the baby's room... except for the furniture. After one more trip to Goodwill and pick-up from Cedar Lake Lodge (we're getting rid of a full sized bed, a random could-be-a-breakfast-table table, and a few other large items) I'll be ready to move the furniture out of the room and it will be empty and ready for painting! (Yeah, no. I'm not moving furniture. I'll have someone else do that.)

4.) Mostly, completed my registry. Asked my co-workers if they'd prefer an invite to my baby shower or, and I quote myself, "if they'd prefer to do their own thing for me."

5.) Somehow, avoided coming off as a heinous gift-hungry snob when I breached this topic of conversation.

6.) Wondered if Wished someone from Ergo Baby Carrier (or one of their competitors) might read this and send me a product to review.

7.) Gained another 6.5 pounds. (Well, probably.)

8.) Sucked it up and purchased a boppy pillow from a consignment sale. (I mean, I paid $10 for it... and I can just register for a new slipcover.)

9.) Cried random-hormonal-pregnant tears only ONCE. (Thankyouverymuch.)

10.) Had the following conversation with hubs... enjoy:

Hubs: I don't care what you name her... I'm calling her Penny.

Amber: You can call her whatever you want, but you'll be calling her that every other weekend.